Bill's LiveJournal Doodad

I got it from my email address. As for how I got that - well, it's a ling story involving the skeleton of a triceritops, a tub of sour cream and Spiro Agnew.

India Foxtrot Yankee Oscar Uniform Charlie Alpha November Uniform November Delta Echo Romeo Sierra Tango Alpha November Delta Tango Hotel India Sierra, Charlie Oscar Papa Yankee Alpha November Delta Papa Alpha Sierra Tango Echo India Tango Tango Oscar Yankee Oscar Uniform Romeo Lima India Victor Echo Juliet Oscar Uniform Romeo November Alpha Lima. :) Whiskey Tango Foxtrot Mike Echo Mike Echo

(Done at the behest of qthewetsprocket)

You never know just how much you use your thumb until you split open a cut on the tip of it. *Then* you find out real quick!

I did a little poll as part of the librarything group (an extension of the book tracking site LibraryThing) that shows all the books I read or re-read in 2009 and compares it to all the ones you (yes, you) have ever read.

If you'd like, feel free to drop by and participate!

Pizza's gonna send out - for you!

Yet again, in the words of the immortal Allen Sherman:

I know a man, his name is Lang,
And he has a neon sign,
And Mr. Lang is very old
So they call it Old Lang's Sign!

Happy MMX, all! (As opposed to "Happy MrXl!")

This will be my fnial communication from 2009.

Those of you who are already there - you know what to do.

Those of you following me - prepare the equipment and bundle up the info.

I will see you all on the other side.

*flutter*
*rustle*
*vanish like the wind*

*the wind just broke his leg*

To the lovely bookworm1225. Who is definitely not a giant chicken!

Rifftrax Live was great tonight. My only quibble: I thought that Weird Al would perform as Jonathan Coulton did. Still, I enjoyed myself greatly.

Happy Birthday to nuveeena, the Woman of the Future!

A little device which I grabbed from the one and only scarfman

Name three fics you think I will never, ever, ever write. In return (and if inspired), I will attempt to write a snippet of one of them.

Hit me up!

Hope everyone (in America) had a great Thanksgiving!

Will be sleeping in tomorrow to avoid the Black Friday marathon.

This morning, I spent three hours in traffic school.

This afternoon, I spent two and a half hours at the theater watching "New Moon".

Thanks, Saturday.

(PS: semi-review to follow tomorrow)

Happy Birthday, epiphany. You're nothing less than fantastic!

Happy Birthday to erstwhile fellow MiSTie, MiSTer, and the High Exalted Commissioner of the MSTFL, freezer818!

Happy Birthday, qthewetsprocket! Hope your birthday is Qlicious!

I was flipping through a magazine earlier today and I came across a picture or Robert "Joe" Haldeman, the CBS new producer accused of trying to blackmail David Letterman. And as I looked upon his scowly visage, the thought occurred to me: he looks like an evil, mirror-universe version of Bill Engvall!

Blue Collar Comedy



White Collar Tragedy

I have a bit of a problem. OK, it's not a problem yet, but it's looming at the horizon. I can tell.

There's this cat that's been roaming our neighborhood for about a year or so. It's black and white and basically just walks around, doing cat-type things. Here he is.



Well, we'd never paid it too much mind, but about three weeks ago, it showed up under the eaves of our garage, limping and meowing pitifully. Paula, who has a much more tender heart towards wounded kitties and puppies and the like, decided that it needed to be fed.

Well, you know what happens when you feed a cat. It's yours. Or rather, you're its. And now that we're feeding it, it doesn't limp so bad. Which I suspect means that all that pitiful meowing is feline-speak for "Suckers!"

Paula went up and down the street looking for the owners, and guess what? She found them! And they don't want Lenny (the cat) back! They say that their toddler is too rough on him. (Can *you* spot the logical fallacy in their reasoning, boys & girls?)

Now the cat wants in. Evey time I come home, he tries to slip past me into the sun room. I'm afraid if he gets in, that's it. And then he'll get into the house itself. Which would be bad (more on that below).

Paula *wants* to bring the cat in. Of course, once he's in, he'd be ours. He'd never leave. And I'm not in theory opposed to this. I don't want to call animal control in, because we all know what happens to unadopted cats there, and I don't want that on my conscience. And I don't want Lenny (or whoever he eventually becomes) to starve or freeze or what have you.

But here's the thing. Piper (the dawg) hates this cat! Hate, hate, hate! This house (in her mind) is hers, and she's the guardian of it and us! If Piper is in the sun room and the cat strolls up to the door, Piper will bark and growl and snarl and makes noises not heard since prehistoric chihuahuas roamed the land. I always thought that in a real fight, though, she'd get creamed since she's kind of a scaredy-cat dog. Then when we found that Lenny had been declawed, I was afraid *he'd* wind up being hurt. But having seen Lenny's tiny, razor-sharp teeth, now I think it's a toss-up.

I don't want to see the cat out there when it starts getting real cold. But I don't want endure a constant barrage of howling and yowling. Or worse, trying to break up a fight!

Does anyone have any advice>

Let's see, that's a hard choice.

Oh no, wait - it's an easy choice. LUXURY HOTEL!!! You know, the place with the beds and the AC and the indoor plumbing.

Nature is best left outdoors - it's nice to look at, but I wouldn't want to live there!